Monday, October 17, 2005

All About Judy

I'm walking down the hallway in the hospital. I stop at a nurses station to pick up some samples that need to be sent to the lab. While at the station I happen to see the medical chart of Judy Miller. I turn and look away because I know that I shouldn't look at it. The nurse comes out and hands me the sample and notices my eyes glancing on Judy Miller's chart. The nurse smirks and says, "Don't you just wanna know what's inside?"

To which I reply, "Isn't that against the law?"

The nurse opens the chart, "No, she told my former fiancee that I had chronic crabs and now he wont return my calls. Sure it was the truth but I was all set to marry him. After what she did to me...look! It says here that Judy was born with testicles but she's scheduled to get them removed a week from today." The nurse looks through the chart some more and notices that the coding on Judy's chart and the code on the blood tube matched the one on Judy's chart. A grinch like smile crosses her lips and she says, "I have access to tons of charts here. This hospital caters to a lot of personalities. If you let what we found out here today slip into your highly read blog and the status of what's in Judy's blood, I'll give you access to lots of secrets and your blog readership will soar!"

I run the sample and discover that Judy has a terminal illness called TraitorousCuntitous. The proposition offered to me suddenly seems more palpable. I thought about the poor nurse and how crestfallen she must have been when she was all ready to marry that man and then Judy had to go and tell the awful truth. Its not like I sought out this information, it was offered to me, I'd just be documenting some facts about Judy and everyone will read my blog!

At this point I am at a crossroads. I can either A.) Be a good citizen and report that there is someone that is sharing detailed, and potentially damaging, medical secrets with passers by in the hospital. Or B.) Write a tell all blog post about Judy Miller's testicles, the surgery to remove them, and her terminal illness TraitorousCuntitous and claim that its freedom of speech. I can defend myself by hiding under the umbrella of "journalism," claiming that I was simply sharing what I knew from a source that I cannot disclose because I would never get any other opportunities, and the large payouts that come with those opportunities, to divulge other damaging secrets given to me by malicious people looking to seek revenge against those who oppose them.


Blogger Jim said...


Brilliant post. Traitorous Cuntitous, poor, poor dear, I hear it very painful too :)

5:03 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 2.5 License.

Powered by Blogger

Listed on BlogShares