Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Guerra civile nella famiglia!!!



The following is an email thread that bounced back and forth in my family. My Uncle is a die hard liberal living in White Plains, NY. My brother-in-law, an officer in the Navy.

-My Uncle sent this to my entire family in an email:

BATTLE HYMN OF THE REPUBLICANS

Mine Eyes have seen the bungling of that stumbling moron Bush;
he has blathered all the drivel that the neo-cons can push;
he has lost sight of all reason 'cause his head is up his tush;

The Doofus marches on.

I have heard him butcher syntax like a kindergarten fool;
There is warranted suspicion that he never went to school;
Should we fault him for the policies - or is he just their tool?
The lies keep piling on.

Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
His wreckage will live on.

I have seen him cut the taxes of the billionaires' lone heir;
As he spends another zillion on an aircraft carrier;
Let the smokestacks keep polluting - do we really need clean air?
The surplus is now gone.

Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
Your safety net is gone!

Now he's got a mighty hankerin' to bomb a prostrate state;
Though the whole world knows its crazy - and the U.N. says to wait;
When he doesn't have the evidence, "We must prevaricate."
Diplomacy is done!

Oh, a trumped-up war is excellent; we have no moral bounds;
Should the reasons be disputed, we'll just make up other grounds;
Enraging several billions - to his brainlessness redounds;
The Doofus marches on!

Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
Glory! Glory! How he'll Screw Ya'!
THIS...DOO...FUS...MAR...CHES...ON!!!!

-Okay har har. Cute political satire right?
-My brother-in-law, an officer in the Navy responded to the entire family with this:

Sorry, I don't find your 'Battle Hymn' amusing.

You might like to know that last week, Nameless Soldier, a Lieutenant on my staff, volunteered to spend the next 18 months of his life serving in the Arabian Gulf area. We were tasked to send someone to augment a Mideast operational staff and Nameless decided he would be the best choice to go. His action is a fine example of someone who understands that we are at war and is willing to do what is required to prevail. I'll be happy to pass along his mailing address when he arrives at his duty station if you'd be interested in sending a care package.

-This is the second time that my brother-in-law has replied to an email from my uncle. The first time he did it, I wrote back and replied to everyone in the family. I of course replied with this:

Dearest Brother-In-Law,

I think that opposing Bush and supporting the troops are mutually compatible stances. It is brave and admirable that someone on your staff has volunteered to go to Iraq for the next 18 months. I sincerely hope that he returns home unscathed and, upon his return, is commended for his sacrifice and service.

However, bringing up his voluntary call to action in the context of the "Battle Hymn" is a red herring. The text of the hymn is in no way pejorative towards the military. It is appropriate for political satire to embellish the faults of elected officials. The hymn, in keeping with political satire, highlights and summarizes the outrageous and embarrassing failures of George Bush and his domestic and foreign policies.

Furthermore, because we are at war it does not mean that freedom of speech is suspended. You can disagree with the hymn and its contents but you cannot insinuate that the person who composed it is any less of a patriot by saying that the soldier who volunteered "is a fine example of someone who understands that we are at war and is willing to do what is required to prevail." It is entirely possible for patriots to either wield the pen or the sword and none dare say that one is better than the other.

-Adam

4 Comments:

Blogger tornwordo said...

You posted it twice. Have you been smoking something? Kidding. I loved the song,so funny. And your response was perfect.

6:59 AM  
Blogger tim said...

Adam, will you marry me? Funny, funny, funny.

7:59 AM  
Blogger Adam said...

sorry about the dual posting, blogger's fault I assure you. this bowl is cashed, time for more greens.

tim your proposal is flattering alas i am already taken. thanks though.

8:23 AM  
Blogger Spider said...

Oh well - I am sure that you can find better places to spend your time than at their house...

btw - thanks for the link to my site Bro - I appreciate it!

12:04 PM  

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