Monday, February 20, 2006

And Stay Out!

On the plane home I had on my right a larger fellow in good spirits that talked just the right amount, and on my left a girl who looked no more than seventeen donning a red hooded sweatshirt and white flannel pajama bottoms with red roses printed on them. Call me prejudiced but I loathe people that go out in public in pajamas. The flight attendants did their usual pre take off announcements after which the child remarked jadedly with intent to sound sophisticated "Well our flight attendants are in a lovely mood tonight aren't they." I turned to her and was about to say something in reply but when I saw her pull an Ugg bag from under the seat in front of her, replete with fur, then proceed to turn off two cell phones one of which was a Razr I decided that it wasn't worth it.

I maintained a perfect ignorance of her for the rest of the flight thanks to my noise reducing headphones. Its amazing how time flies listening to Confessions on Dancefloor whilst playing breakout on my iPod.

Once we began our descent into DFW the friendly man to my right and I were talking about where we lived. I told him I lived in Oaklawn and he added that he lived in Addison. The child heard our exchange and, uninvitedly, interjected:

"Wow! Ya'll live in Dallas Dallas then, like in the city. I remember when I was a kid and we used to go to Mississippi for summer vacation we would drive through that area. How do you deal with all the traffic and living near all those people. I mean really, I live west of Fort Worth and it suits me fine."

This time I couldn't resist. I calculated the appropriate dramatic speed of which to turn my head, turned it and looked the demon in her arian eye and said with consternation and exclusivity, "It's not for everyone." The last I heard from her mouth she was speaking on her cell phone to who knows what kind of trash telling them that when she got off the plane she'd be "out fernt smokin' a ceegarette."


Blogger tim said...

I love you!

8:12 AM  
Blogger CLL Canuck said...

Welcome back to the promised land. I'm glad you only had a limited contact with the South Fork Princess (Or is Buffet Fork?). I am assuming that Dan (like me) has to teach those Ugg toating princesses every day. Think about that whilst hovering in the warm, cozy lab of yours, you lucky dog.

8:19 AM  
Blogger Hypoxic said...

That's just one of the many reasons why I hate flying. You get in your seat and you're held captive by your neighbor(s) until you land.

Unfortunately, I'll be on a plane tomorrow so we'll see how lady luck treats me. The good part is it's only a two hour non-stop trip.

8:37 PM  
Blogger farmboyz said...

Ha! Love her to death! I can see her, thank you.

9:25 PM  
Blogger Sunshine said...

That's hilarious. :P At least you didn't draw on her while she slept. ;P

9:54 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

HA HA. that is so hysterical. Welcome to my life. Come back to PHX soon


10:18 PM  

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